Frequently Asked Questions

SCFRE is a non-profit organization dedicated to advocating for diverse family and relationship structures, with a special focus on polyamorous, ethically non-monogamous, and other non-conventional relationship forms outside of the common, mono-normative, nuclear model in Eurocentric culture. SCFRE also champions the rights of marginalized communities, including LGBTQIA+ individuals, BIPOC (Black, Indigenous, People of Color) communities, differently-abled individuals, immigrants, refugees, and all other individuals experiencing systemic oppression and/or state violence.

Our objectives include:

• Advocating for legal recognition of diverse family and relationship structures, including polyamorous partnerships.
• Providing educational resources on the legitimacy and rights of diverse families and relationships.
• Promoting anti-discrimination and anti-harassment policies to ensure inclusion for all family and relationship types.
• Creating community partnerships to support systemic change in family and relationship law and policy.
• Championing racial justice, intersectionality, and decolonization in all our advocacy efforts.

Through these efforts, SCFRE strives to create a more inclusive, equitable society where all forms of families and relationships are acknowledged and protected.

There are many misconceptions surrounding polyamory and ethical non-monogamy (ENM). Below are some of the most common myths, along with facts and information to clarify:

Myth 1: Polyamory and ENM are just about sex
Fact: Polyamory and ethical non-monogamy are about more than just sexual relationships. These relationships often involve deep emotional connections, shared goals, mutual caregiving, and long-term commitments between multiple partners. According to the Legal Advocacy Coalition (PLAC), polyamorous relationships emphasize honesty, consent, and communication among all parties.

Myth 2: Polyamorous relationships are unstable or unsustainable
Fact: Like monogamous relationships, polyamorous relationships vary in their levels of success and longevity. Many polyamorous families form long-term, committed bonds that are as stable as monogamous relationships. Studies by the Modern Family Institute show that people in polyamorous relationships report high levels of satisfaction and feel secure in their partnerships.

Myth 3: Polyamory is uncommon or rare
Fact: Polyamory and ENM are becoming increasingly visible and accepted. According to a study from the Organization for Polyamory and Ethical Non-monogamy (OPEN), more than 1 in 5 adults in the United States have engaged in some form of consensual non-monogamy in their lifetime. Polyamory is far from rare—it is part of the wide range of relationship structures that exist today.

Myth 4: Polyamorous families cannot raise children in a healthy environment
Fact: Research consistently shows that children raised in polyamorous families fare just as well as children in monogamous households. They often benefit from having a wider network of caregiving adults. The Modern Family Institute notes that children raised in polyamorous households tend to develop strong communication skills and an understanding of diverse relationship dynamics.

SCFRE supports a broad definition of the family, which includes:

• Polyamorous families: Relationships involving multiple consensual, loving partners.
• Ethically non-monogamous (ENM) relationships: Partnerships where individuals may have multiple romantic or sexual partners with the full knowledge and consent of everyone involved.
• Chosen families: Networks of support and caregiving that may not be based on biological or legal ties but are built around mutual care, including LGBTQIA+ chosen families and queer platonic partnerships (QPPs).
• Single individuals living alone by choice: People who choose not to live with a romantic partner or family but still create meaningful networks of care and support.
• Domestic mutual care networks: Groups of individuals, often unrelated by blood or legal ties, who share caregiving responsibilities, emotional support, and resources within a shared household or community.

SCFRE recognizes that these diverse family structures challenge existing social norms and, as a result, often face discrimination. We work to ensure that all families and relationship types receive respect, legal recognition, and social acceptance.

Polyamory and ethical non-monogamy (ENM) are by no means exclusive to the LGBTQIA+ community. These relationship structures are practiced by individuals across a wide range of sexual orientations, gender identities, and cultural backgrounds. In fact, roughly one-third of respondents to OPEN's 2024 Community Survey identify as straight or heterosexual. However, there are important connections between the polyamory/ENM community, and LGBTQIA+ advocacy:

1. Shared principles of inclusivity and acceptance
   Both polyamory/ENM and LGBTQIA+ advocacy challenge existing societal norms about relationships, love, and family. They emphasize the importance of consent, authenticity, and creating space for diverse forms of connection.
2. Prevalence among LGBTQIA+ individuals
   While people of all orientations engage in ENM, studies have shown that individuals in the LGBTQIA+ community are more likely to explore polyamorous or non-monogamous relationships. This may be due to shared values around challenging normative expectations and fostering intentional relationships.
3. Intersection of discrimination and stigma
   Both LGBTQIA+ individuals and people in polyamorous/ENM relationships often face societal stigma, legal challenges, and discrimination. Advocacy for these groups frequently intersects in efforts to secure equal rights under the law.
4. Inclusive family and relationship advocacy
   Organizations like SCFRE work to ensure that all family and relationship structures, whether rooted in LGBTQIA+ identities or other diverse social networks, receive the recognition and support they deserve.

Ultimately, polyamory and ENM are relationship structures that transcend specific identities or communities. They are part of the broader movement to redefine love, family, and connection in ways that reflect the diversity of human relationships.

SCFRE believes that all family and relationship structures deserve recognition and respect. Legal protections and societal support are often centered on monogamous relationships, which can leave many people vulnerable to discrimination in areas such as housing, healthcare, and child custody.

Our advocacy is focused on:

• Legal recognition of polyamorous relationships, so that multiple partners can access the same rights and protections as monogamous couples.
• Challenging definitions of family that exclude non-conventional families from benefits such as healthcare access, family leave, and inheritance rights.
• Promoting understanding and inclusion for families and relationships of all types, so they are not marginalized or stigmatized by society.

Polyamory and Ethical Non-Monogamy (ENM) are increasingly recognized relationship structures in the United States.

Key statistics include:

• Prevalence of ENM: Approximately 4–5% of Americans are currently engaged in ethical non-monogamous relationships.
• Lifetime Engagement: About 21% of U.S. adults have participated in an ENM relationship at some point in their lives.
• Interest in Polyamory: Roughly 1 in 6 Americans express interest in engaging in polyamorous relationships.
• Demographics: Individuals in polyamorous and ENM relationships are more likely to identify as bisexual or pansexual than heterosexual.
• Millennial Perspectives: A 2016 study showed that only half of American millennials want a completely monogamous relationship
.

These trends underscore the growing visibility and interest in polyamory and ENM in the U.S., reflecting a shift toward diverse relationship models beyond monogamy and the nuclear family. See the Kinsey Institute and OPEN's 2024 Community Survey for more information.

A queer platonic partnership (QPP) is a committed relationship that goes beyond typical definitions of friendship but may not involve romantic or sexual attraction. These partnerships are often characterized by deep emotional connections, shared life goals, and mutual caregiving.

Key Features of Queer Platonic Partnerships:

• Emphasis on emotional intimacy: QPPs prioritize a strong, unique bond between partners that doesn't necessarily fit within societal expectations of romantic or sexual relationships.
• Flexible relationship roles: Partners in a QPP often define their own roles and expectations, free from normative labels like "friend" or "spouse."
• Chosen family: QPPs are often viewed as a form of chosen family, reflecting the idea that meaningful relationships don't have to conform to conventional definitions.

For example, a person in a polyamorous relationship might also have a QPP with someone who is not a romantic or sexual partner but still plays a central role in their life. Similarly, individuals in ENM relationships may include QPPs as part of their broader network of significant connections.
By advocating for the recognition of QPPs as a type of polyamorous domestic partnership, SCFRE supports the idea that all forms of consensual and loving relationships deserve visibility, respect, and legal protections.

Living alone by choice is an increasingly common trend in many parts of the world, including the U.S. Many people live alone while maintaining strong social connections and community ties, but prefer not to live with a romantic partner or family.

According to data from the Modern Family Institute:

• 28% of U.S. households are composed of a single person living alone.
• Many individuals who live alone by choice still engage in community caregiving networks or chosen families, emphasizing that family doesn't always have to mean living together under the same roof.
• People who live alone by choice report a strong sense of independence and autonomy but often form close-knit relationships with friends, neighbors, and other social circles.

SCFRE acknowledges the importance of decolonization in our advocacy efforts and is committed to working in solidarity with indigenous communities, especially the Duwamish Tribe, whose unceded ancestral lands encompass the area known as Seattle .

We are actively engaged in:

• Land acknowledgment practices, recognizing the land on which SCFRE operates as the unceded traditional territory of the Duwamish people.
• Collaborating with the Duwamish Tribe to promote cultural understanding and support their fight for sovereignty and recognition.
• Ensuring Indigenous perspectives are included in our advocacy for family and relationship diversity, as indigenous communities have long upheld alternative family structures that reflect communal caregiving and interconnectedness.
• Supporting Real Rent Duwamish, an initiative that enables residents and organizations to provide financial support to the Duwamish Tribe. Contributions to Real Rent help sustain essential programs, cultural preservation efforts, and the Duwamish Tribe's fight for federal recognition. SCFRE encourages its supporters to visit Real Rent Duwamish to learn more and contribute.

There are many ways to get involved with SCFRE's mission:

• Become a volunteer: Join our advocacy efforts or help out with community outreach and educational events.
• Donate: Your contributions help us continue our work supporting all families and advocating for legal reforms.
• Attend an event: Stay connected by attending SCFRE events, workshops, or community discussions.